Aprils fools, p.19
April's Fools, page 19
I don’t know if this makes us the fucking smartest and luckiest assholes in this dying world, or if we’ll be the biggest fools Remington April has ever played. I guess we’ll find out.
17
Brant
I’m stuck again.
At first, everything is dark and peaceful. But the world shifts, and then I’m back in my gear and fatigues. The sun is fucking baking us alive now, but I know as soon as it goes down, it’ll take all of the warmth with it, and that stark, desert coldness will sink into my bones. Theo and Madix are here, discussing the mission with our other squad members. We’re in some rickety building, the wooden slats cracked and dilapidated from age and weather. It’s an odd juxtaposition to have all of our expensive computers and military equipment inside the crumbling building. The ground is mostly hard-packed dirt, the floorboards rotted away years ago. Dirt surrounds us here. It gets fucking everywhere. I have to dump piles of it out of my boots every night when I take them off.
It’s dark when the first explosion goes off. My brain doesn’t register what’s happening. One minute, I’m looking at coordinates, half-listening to Madix and Theo, and then the next, all I know is heat and weightlessness. The boom is so loud that my ears fail me. My body lands hard, and when I’m able to pick up my head again, I see the last of the rickety old building on the verge of collapse. Fire and smoke is everywhere. There’s dirt caked on the inside of my mouth and nostrils, and I have to spit several times just to clear it enough to breathe. I’m about to call out to one of my squad members when the second explosion goes off.
One second, he’s there, and the next… There’s just burnt blood and pieces.
I can’t move. I can’t hear or speak. Panic wells up inside of me, and I force myself to get the fuck up, because I know if I don’t, I’ll die. Using every ounce of willpower I have, I roll over and get to my feet, but my eyes are burning, making my vision clouded, and it makes everything even more disorienting.
I squint, searching for my other squad members, but when I stumble forward, I just find another dead body. The panic wants to overtake me as I whirl around, desperate to find Theo and Madix. I start yelling their names, even though it’s probably the stupidest thing I can do right now, since we’re under attack.
I’m about to rush back into the building when I see a figure coming out of the smoke, tugging a body under the arms. I rush forward to Madix and help him pull Theo out of the building before the last wall falls on them. Blood is dripping out of Madix’s ears, pieces of his shirt are burned to nothing, and it looks as if his shirt has melted into his skin. Madix is limping badly, but Theo… Theo’s leg is just a mess of bone and blood, and he’s unconscious. He has little wounds and cuts all over, and I look down at my arms and see they’re in a similar state.
We pull Theo further and further away, trying to get to our convoy, and Madix keeps stopping to check for our other squad members, but we both know already—everyone else is dead. When we get into the vehicle, all I can think about is how that could have been our bodies scattered in pieces all over the fucking desert.
In a way, we did leave pieces of ourselves behind that day. Pieces that we can never get back.
I scream, feeling the dirt caked in my mouth again, smelling blood and smoke. Hearing the god-awful sound of the explosion going off, before there was no sound at all. I just want it to end.
The panic makes bile rise into my throat, and when I move to puke my guts out, I feel a cool hand covering my forehead and hear soft words speaking low in my ear.
My eyes snap open, and I look around wildly, but it’s dark. When I feel a hand come up to touch my arm, I flinch, rearing back to shove the person away, but a strong fist catches my forearm. “Brant, it’s okay. It’s just us. You were asleep.”
I have to blink several times to recognize Madix’s voice, but it all comes together when a heavy, fur-covered body settles into my lap. The feel of Puddles pulls me out of my confusion, and I register that I’m in a tent. I recognize Remi’s shadowed silhouette beside me, and my stomach plummets. “Fuck,” I say, running my hands down my face. “I’m sorry. Did I hurt you?”
Her cool hand returns to my face. “You have nothing to be sorry for,” she says quietly.
I drape my arms over my bent knees and shake my head. “I could’ve hurt you.”
“We wouldn’t have let that happen,” Madix says.
Madix and Theo share a look, and then Theo clears his throat. “It’s just about dawn. I’ll go get some water boiling so we can get going.”
Madix looks at Remi before following Theo out, leaving me and Remi alone. Puddles has moved to my left side, her wet nose pressed against my leg as she watches me. I let a shaky hand drop down to scratch her head. I feel embarrassed as fuck that Remi had to see me like this. “I bet you’re re-thinking this whole thing with us now, huh?” I ask with a humorless laugh. “We’re quite the catch. I swear, our baggage has baggage.”
“Everyone’s fucked up in one way or another,” she says, nudging me over so she can get under the sleeping bag with me. She’s not close enough though, so I pull her into my lap and run my hand up her thigh. She’s wearing thin leggings, and I think one of Theo’s shirts with the sleeves rolled up at the wrists.
“You wanna talk about it?” she asks, moving her hand to the back of my jaw, where she lightly runs her fingers over it. I’m usually smooth there, but dark-blond scruff has collected over the past couple of days since I haven’t had a chance to shave.
I blow out a breath as I start to rub circles over her thigh with my thumb. “We were the only three to survive the explosion.” I pause, and for some reason, it’s like I need a moment to swallow the reality of that statement even though I’ve lived and re-lived it for years. “We were just going over the final details of out recon assignment when it happened, and it wiped out the rest of our squad,” I find myself telling her. “The night terrors and flashbacks started right away, and that was really fucking hard. I had a traumatic brain injury, but when I recovered, my eyesight was effected, and I had some balance issues for a while. Sometimes, I feel like I’ll never escape, and sometimes I feel like I don’t deserve to.” Puddles leans into me more and I rub her neck and back.
Remi is quiet as she listens to me, and I’m grateful, because I don’t think I could handle questions right now. “Theo’s leg got fucked up. It could have been worse, but Madix got to him before the fire could and pulled him free.”
“Jesus,” Remi hisses under her breath.
“Madix blames himself. He was our squad leader. He had a lot of responsibility on his shoulders, but it wasn’t his fault. We were in hostile territory. He did everything right, but he’s never been able to let that guilt go. Hell, I don’t know if any of us will really ever stop feeling guilty that we’re here and they’re not.”
I see her nod slowly, like she’s taking that information in. Her fingers dance from my scruffy, three-day-old beard to the back of my head, where she tugs at the strands of hair where my head and neck meet.
“I’m glad you guys have each other,” she says quietly, and I nod, because I think that every day.
“What about you?” I ask, before I can stop myself.
She blinks at me, confused by the question. “What about me?”
“Do we have you?”
She tilts her head and studies me, and I wish I could snatch back my words and shove them down my stupid throat. Why am I even going there right now? We’ve had sex once. Nothing about our current circumstances is normal, and time isn’t exactly on our side. According to Remi, we’re only a couple days from Endstone now, and who knows what will happen in the future with this virus, with us, or anything for that matter.
“Do you want to have me?” she asks, like she’s genuinely curious.
I could play things off and make a joke to lighten the intense tone I just set, but fuck it. I’ve dug the hole this deep already, so I might as well see if I can turn it into a nice sized swimming pool. One that I could use to drown myself in when Remi shuts me down at any moment. “Yeah, I do. I think you’re exactly what we need.”
We stare at each other, the shadows dancing across our faces, and she looks so fucking beautiful. I want to flip her on her back and give her so many orgasms that she has no choice but to admit that we’re exactly what she needs too.
Finally, after what feels like a fucking eternity, she opens her mouth to reply, but before she can put me out of my misery and say something, Madix suddenly flips open the tent flap. “We have a fucking problem. Get dressed, now,” he says ominously, leaving before I can ask what the fuck is going on.
Remi and I immediately jump into action. I dig into my bag and yank on some pants and a shirt, quickly stuffing my feet into my boots. Remi is ready when I am, and we hurry out of the tent to find Madix and Theo with their guns ready, poised behind a couple of trees and eyes focused ahead. It’s that weird time of morning, right before the sun comes up, so everything is bathed in tones of gray. Madix immediately puts up hand signals to fill me in on what’s happening, and as I read them, my blood turns to ice and fear claws its way up my throat.
“What’s going on?” Remi asks on a whisper.
“We’ve got people coming our way,” I explain, and watch as she looks back in the direction that Madix and Brant are watching. I see the debate in her features, and I know in this moment that Remi still doesn’t fully believe what we’ve been telling her. I just fucking hope that she’s not about to learn the hard way by being exposed and getting sick.
“Get your gun,” I tell her, my expression fierce and my tone crucial, so that she knows exactly how serious this is. “Do everything we tell you to. This isn’t a joke, and we have no idea what they want. If they’re sick...” my voice trails off as Puddles gives a low warning growl.
Madix and Brant suddenly back up towards us, and I wait for their instructions. Maybe we have enough time to pack up what we can and make a run for it. Evade and live, that’s the goal, but one look at their faces shows me that’s not an option.
“Five men approaching,” Madix says as they come up beside us. “Mid-twenties from what we can tell in this light. They have weapons—looking like hunting rifles. We didn’t see them until just now, and we don’t have time to pack up before they get here,” he says, his face grim. “Each of us guards a point of the compass. Keep an eye out for anyone trying to surround us or come from behind.”
I nod and call for south. Madix calls east, Theo chooses north, and Remi doesn’t say anything at all, but turns to face west. I feel like we wait for an eternity in the gray mist of dawn, our backs facing each other as we keep in formation to watch. The morning air is cold, but my blood is running so hot that I feel a drip of sweat travel down the back of my neck. In the next moment, shadowy figures break through the trees into a wider clearing about twenty feet away.
As soon as the group steps from the treeline, we all have our weapons up except for Remi, who’s holding hers half-heartedly with a wary look on her face.
“Don’t come any closer,” Madix barks out, and I see the group of guys freeze. They squint and turn in our direction, noticing us with our guns trained on them, and immediately hold their hands up. “We’re armed, and we will fire if you try to come any closer,” Madix says. “What do you want?”
The five guys look from one to another, and the shortest of the group clears his throat. “We’re not here to cause any trouble. Our campsite got trashed by a moose. We saw your fire and wanted to ask if you had any supplies to spare, or medicine we could have.”
At the mention of medicine, Madix tenses even more.
“Why do you need medicine?” he asks, his tone turning flat. It’s not a warning sign unless you know him, but he’s already going full Jiminy Cricket.
“Our friend twisted his ankle running from the moose, and another one of our friends is just...having some stomach problems.” As soon the short guy finishes saying this, a couple other guys in their group share a look, and it sends alarm bells blaring inside of me. Fuck. They’re sick, and any one of these guys could be contagious. I want to pull the neck of my shirt over my mouth and nose in an extra effort for protection, but I don’t take my hands off my rifle or divert my focus.
“Turn back around,” Madix says in that deadly empty voice of his.
The shorter man runs his gaze over all of us. “You guys military?” he asks.
None of us answer. He starts to say something else, but a lanky guy in his group talks over him. “Just help us out, and we’ll be on our way,” he demands, and then he starts looking over our things like he’s making a mental tally of what he wants.
“I didn’t hear a please with that request,” Madix monotones, glaring at the lanky, entitled asshole.
“Fuck you,” the guy retorts, and takes a step towards us. One of his buddies tries to grab his arm to pull him away, but the man just shrugs him off and points at Madix. “We know you got supplies, and you’re gonna help us.”
Shit. This is gonna go bad.
Brant and I tighten our grips on our guns, but Madix tips his head back slightly and laughs. It’s not a nice sound. It’s a dark, humorless laugh that is full of menace. And even though he looks like he’s not giving these guys the time of day, he’s watching them like a hawk. “That’s big talk for a little guy like you,” Madix says with condescension. “We aren’t giving you shit. This is your last warning. Turn around and go back the way you came. You’ve all been exposed to your buddy’s illness, and any one of you could be contagious. So I’m gonna tell you one last time. Leave. Now.”
Two of the guys in the group look like they want no part of this showdown, but the other three take another step forward. All friendly pretense is dropped as each of them raise their guns on us. I hear Remi curse under her breath and try to step forward to intervene, but Madix’s hand shoots out and clamps her around the wrist. “Don’t.”
The tone of his voice must bely how fucked this situation is, because she actually backs down.
“Everyone just calm down,” I say evenly. “No one wants to get shot.”
“We won’t be the ones with a bullet in us,” Madix says darkly, and the twisted fucker actually sounds excited about this whole turn of events.
“Don’t be a bunch of fucking dicks! Give us some supplies. First aid kit and some extra medicine if you have it. Food, too. Then we’ll leave.” I’m not sure if the guy is just an idiot, or if he’s desperate, but I’m guessing it’s a bit of both.
In answer, Madix fires.
Wet dirt flies up from the ground directly next to the lanky guy’s right foot. I release a mumbled curse, because taking warning shots at people who also have their weapons pointed at you is a good way to get shot. What the fuck is he thinking? Thank fuck these idiots don’t start pulling triggers in fear or retaliation. All five of the guys flinch, and two of them turn tail and run.
“Fucking crazy asshole!” the short man yells. “We just need some fucking help! He’s puking his guts out, man! He’s dehydrated, can’t keep anything down. You want that on your conscience if he dies?”
Stupid motherfucker doesn’t realize—Madix doesn’t have a conscience right now.
“Everyone is fucking dying,” Madix says evenly. “But you’ll be going to ground first if you don’t leave now. I gave you one warning shot. I won’t give you another.”
The guy stares Madix down hard. My heart is pounding, and my grip on my rifle is getting clammy. Remi is breathing hard beside me, and Theo’s jaw twitches with tension. For a split second, I see the desperation on the other man’s face, and my stomach plummets. This is what the world has become. We’re already turning on each out of fear and desperation. Is this what the future holds for all of us, just more of these showdowns of take or get taken?
Madix is completely still, his legs spread with confidence, the guy in his sights. Finally, finally, the man lowers his gun and his two friends follow suit. With a sneer, he spits at the ground. “Fuck you. I hope you all get fucking sick out here and die.”
Without another word, he stomps away back into the treeline, and the other two follow behind him.
None of us move or relax, just in case it’s a trap. After a very long five minutes, when the group is long out of sight or hearing distance, Madix says, “Brant and Remington, pack up. Theo and I will keep watching.”
Remi and I move and start packing up camp in record time. “That scenario was a bit intense,” she mumbles.
I snort humorlessly. “You think?”
Thank goodness Madix didn’t actually shoot one of those assholes. I’m even more surprised that one of their group didn’t get trigger happy and shoot at us. That whole thing could’ve gone much, much worse. I want to get the fuck out of here before any of them decides to retaliate out of anger.
We head in the opposite direction that the other group went, but Madix doesn’t lose the tension in his body or the way his eyes constantly scan the surroundings. The confrontation spooked all of us. Even hours later, Remi still hasn’t lost the frown on her face, and she’s been uncharacteristically quiet. None of us say a word as we continue to hike down the mountain, and it’s not until late afternoon that Madix finally lets us stop for a break.
The reality of what’s happening in the rest of the country—and probably the world at this point—just stood up and bitch-slapped all of us, and there is a renewed sense of urgency now to make it back to Endstone and to safety. We eat, drink, and get a move on, all without a word, and it isn’t until about hour six on our feet that I just can’t take it anymore.
